FAQ's
I don't know anything about adoption - what kind of people adopt children?
People just like you and I adopt children. Frequently, married couples who cannot biologically produce
their own children want to adopt, but more and more, there are single people wanting to adopt children as
well as families that already have other children by birth or adoption. Adoptive parents come in all shapes
and sizes, traditional types of families as well as nontraditional.
What kind of financial assistance can I expect to receive?
This will depend on the state law of the state where you live (or where you deliver the baby). There are a
few "adoption-friendly" states such as Louisiana and Florida, where the birth mother can receive living
expenses, medical expenses, legal expenses and travel expenses. Then there are states such as
Tennessee and Massachusetts, that limit the financial support to specific time frames (like the last 90 days
of the pregnancy) or a particular amount (such as $1,000.00 per month for three months). There are even
some states like Missouri, where no support of any kind is allowed. Be sure you know what is legal in your
state or be prepared to relocate to a state that allows support, if only for the term of the pregnancy.
What kind of information can I expect to have about the child after the adoption?
This will depend entirely on the adopting parents and you - if you want to have pictures or letters sent to
you, be sure to make your request clear and in writing. The adopting parents will need to be in agreement
with you on whatever your request is - remember, neither the attorney nor the agency can force the
adopting parents to provide pictures or letters after the adoption is complete, so make sure you are in
agreement ahead of time. This will avoid any hurt feelings at a later date, since everything will be clear up
front.
Will I have any choice of adoptive families for my child?
This will be entirely up to you. If you want to choose the family for your child, we will be happy to provide
profiles of prospective adoptive families that meet your requirements. If you want a more closed adoption
and desire that the agency choose the family, we can do that also. We keep many color profiles and "Dear
Birth mother" letters in our office for your review.
How do I know these people will be good parents?
People who adopt (in legal adoptions), have to go through an extensive, exhaustive background check in
order to be approved to adopt. The major portion of this background check is called a "home study",
where a licensed social worker investigates the family through personal visits, references, criminal
background clearances, health verifications and other related information. Home studies must be done by
a licensed social worker or a social worker employed by a licensed agency, depending on state law. In
general, home studies are pretty thorough and check out the potential parents with so many checks and
balances that any unfavorable information would come out. Although parenting itself does not come with a
manual, once a parent or parents have received an approved home study, we can be sure that the child
will be placed in a good home. If you are working with an attorney or directly with potential parents, be sure
that you see a copy of the home study by a licensed agency.
Should I meet the adoptive parents? Some birth parents are comfortable with this and others are not. Don't
let anyone "suggest" to you that you "should" do one thing or the other. Remember that there are good
and bad points to either decision, and that meeting the parents will not tell you if they are "the right ones".
If you can be levelheaded about a meeting, then go ahead if that is important to you. Just make sure it IS
important to you and not just a whim. Also, remember that the adopting parents may have their own
feelings about meeting you - again, this is something that should be established up front, and once a
decision is made, both parties should stick to it and not change the rules in the middle of the process.
Will I be provided with confidential counseling?
You certainly should be provided with this. Many agencies, like Beacon House, have staff in the office that
can counsel with you. However, most do not "go the extra mile" and have outside independent licensed
social workers available to you as well. Beacon House makes this additional option available to you once
you enter our program.
What should I do first if I am seriously considering adoption?
You can contact us 24/7, by phone or Email. Our toll free number is 1-888-987-6300. Our E-mail is
dawn@beaconhouseadopt.com. You can speak confidentially to a counselor who will really listen to you
and address your questions. If adoption seems the right decision, some background information will be
taken about you and the birth father. Then, we will ascertain what you need and how best to go about
obtaining assistance for you. You will have to provide a proof of pregnancy and sign certain consent
forms. Then, all you need do is tell us what kind of family you are seeking and let us do the rest!
What do other birth mothers that have gone through your agency think of it?
We have a number of birth mothers that have found the experience a little easier for the assistance
provided by our agency. Some would be willing to talk with you about adoption, others just email us and let
us know later what they felt. We are planning to add some of their comments to this page in the near
future. Look for them!
Remember, adoption is a gift of love you are giving to your child. It is a courageous and unselfish act, for
to make an adoption plan for your child is a difficult and emotional thing to do. You must love this child
beyond imagination to consider this, and Beacon House staff understands that. We have helped over
1,500 women through this process with care and emotional support, and we can be there for you.
I don't know anything about adoption - what kind of people adopt children?
People just like you and I adopt children. Frequently, married couples who cannot biologically produce
their own children want to adopt, but more and more, there are single people wanting to adopt children as
well as families that already have other children by birth or adoption. Adoptive parents come in all shapes
and sizes, traditional types of families as well as nontraditional.
What kind of financial assistance can I expect to receive?
This will depend on the state law of the state where you live (or where you deliver the baby). There are a
few "adoption-friendly" states such as Louisiana and Florida, where the birth mother can receive living
expenses, medical expenses, legal expenses and travel expenses. Then there are states such as
Tennessee and Massachusetts, that limit the financial support to specific time frames (like the last 90 days
of the pregnancy) or a particular amount (such as $1,000.00 per month for three months). There are even
some states like Missouri, where no support of any kind is allowed. Be sure you know what is legal in your
state or be prepared to relocate to a state that allows support, if only for the term of the pregnancy.
What kind of information can I expect to have about the child after the adoption?
This will depend entirely on the adopting parents and you - if you want to have pictures or letters sent to
you, be sure to make your request clear and in writing. The adopting parents will need to be in agreement
with you on whatever your request is - remember, neither the attorney nor the agency can force the
adopting parents to provide pictures or letters after the adoption is complete, so make sure you are in
agreement ahead of time. This will avoid any hurt feelings at a later date, since everything will be clear up
front.
Will I have any choice of adoptive families for my child?
This will be entirely up to you. If you want to choose the family for your child, we will be happy to provide
profiles of prospective adoptive families that meet your requirements. If you want a more closed adoption
and desire that the agency choose the family, we can do that also. We keep many color profiles and "Dear
Birth mother" letters in our office for your review.
How do I know these people will be good parents?
People who adopt (in legal adoptions), have to go through an extensive, exhaustive background check in
order to be approved to adopt. The major portion of this background check is called a "home study",
where a licensed social worker investigates the family through personal visits, references, criminal
background clearances, health verifications and other related information. Home studies must be done by
a licensed social worker or a social worker employed by a licensed agency, depending on state law. In
general, home studies are pretty thorough and check out the potential parents with so many checks and
balances that any unfavorable information would come out. Although parenting itself does not come with a
manual, once a parent or parents have received an approved home study, we can be sure that the child
will be placed in a good home. If you are working with an attorney or directly with potential parents, be sure
that you see a copy of the home study by a licensed agency.
Should I meet the adoptive parents? Some birth parents are comfortable with this and others are not. Don't
let anyone "suggest" to you that you "should" do one thing or the other. Remember that there are good
and bad points to either decision, and that meeting the parents will not tell you if they are "the right ones".
If you can be levelheaded about a meeting, then go ahead if that is important to you. Just make sure it IS
important to you and not just a whim. Also, remember that the adopting parents may have their own
feelings about meeting you - again, this is something that should be established up front, and once a
decision is made, both parties should stick to it and not change the rules in the middle of the process.
Will I be provided with confidential counseling?
You certainly should be provided with this. Many agencies, like Beacon House, have staff in the office that
can counsel with you. However, most do not "go the extra mile" and have outside independent licensed
social workers available to you as well. Beacon House makes this additional option available to you once
you enter our program.
What should I do first if I am seriously considering adoption?
You can contact us 24/7, by phone or Email. Our toll free number is 1-888-987-6300. Our E-mail is
dawn@beaconhouseadopt.com. You can speak confidentially to a counselor who will really listen to you
and address your questions. If adoption seems the right decision, some background information will be
taken about you and the birth father. Then, we will ascertain what you need and how best to go about
obtaining assistance for you. You will have to provide a proof of pregnancy and sign certain consent
forms. Then, all you need do is tell us what kind of family you are seeking and let us do the rest!
What do other birth mothers that have gone through your agency think of it?
We have a number of birth mothers that have found the experience a little easier for the assistance
provided by our agency. Some would be willing to talk with you about adoption, others just email us and let
us know later what they felt. We are planning to add some of their comments to this page in the near
future. Look for them!
Remember, adoption is a gift of love you are giving to your child. It is a courageous and unselfish act, for
to make an adoption plan for your child is a difficult and emotional thing to do. You must love this child
beyond imagination to consider this, and Beacon House staff understands that. We have helped over
1,500 women through this process with care and emotional support, and we can be there for you.
| Dear Birth mother: Beacon House understands that this decision you are considering is the most difficult, frightening thing you may ever do. Even considering whether adoption is the best thing in your particular situation can be scary and upsetting. Please know that we are not here to judge you or push you into a decision. Our staff has over 50 years of combined experience in listening to you, helping you determine what is best for you and your unborn child. Please call us today if you have questions about your situation. We can offer understanding and empathetic staff, and if you decide that adoption is right for you, we can provide assistance with your expenses, subject to state law. Call today 1-888-987-6300 |
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